I am scheduled for a c-section on Thursday afternoon. Just one more day with this miracle baby kicking me. I am getting sad for this pregnancy to be over, but I am excited to meet him. I have been feeling pretty good for the most part – no real swelling (despite the heat), my sacroiliac pain is minimal as long as I do my stretches every day. I have gained 33 pounds as of my last doctor appointment. I am just really tired and have very little energy to chase Birdie around these days.
The only real issue lately is that S and I haven’t been getting along well. He is sleep deprived and cranky, and I am emotional and teary. Birdie has been having problems falling asleep. Tonight it was nearly 11 by the time she was sound asleep. She generally sleeps through the night fine, but just takes hours to fall asleep, no matter what time we start bedtime, or what we have done in the day. I took her swimming today at the outdoor gym pool and thought I thoroughly tired her out. Nope.
I wanted the last few days to be peaceful and relaxed, instead of us snipping at each other and me feeling sad. I think I am probably just too sensitive and overreacting. I am sad for Birdie that our days of focusing on just her are coming to an end. She has been so much fun lately, but also has been throwing epic tantrums once in a while.
Of course there are the fears too, that this is too good to be true. That something will go wrong, that there will be something wrong with the baby that the anatomy scan and screening tests didn’t pick up on. Please be healthy, little baby. Please.
Here I am the other day, at 38.5 weeks…