Posted by: birdsandsquirrels | September 1, 2009

registering after infertility

I’m traveling back home in two weeks for my shower. Gulp. Yes, a shower. Which means we needed to register. If you are thinking to yourself “Wow, that’s awfully early!”, well, yes it is. I can’t fly across the country past mid-October (due to insurance restrictions on travel, as well as common sense), and my best friend who is throwing the shower has weddings and parties and grad school classes to attend on the weekends in late September through late October so the only date that worked for her was mid-September. I’ll only be 26 weeks at that point, and it seems ridiculously early, but there was really no other option. The shower will be very small, mostly just family and very close friends. I hate being the center of attention, but I am looking forward to being around so many wise women that I don’t get to see very often, who will hopefully give me good advice and not just scare me with labor horror stories.

At the end of last week, S and I went and registered. I wonder if the sales people at BRU can spot the “pregnant after infertility” couples from a mile away. We are the ones with the anxious looks of disbelief on our faces, wondering if lightning will strike us the moment we pick up that scanner and have the audacity to pick out items for our future baby before it is safely in our arms. I gave the scanner to S because I was so scared of it. We wandered around for like fifteen minutes before scanning our first item. We put ten things on it before we wandered back to the registry counter, emotionally exhausted and ready for a nap. I really never thought we’d be here. The registry lady sort of chastised us for only picking a few items. “We’ll add more online,” I assured her. “We just are overwhelmed.” Overwhelmed, happy, and scared all at the same time.



  1. Sounds EXACTY luck our first time registering. I remember handing back the scanner feeling guilty that we had only tagged I think 12 things and looking at the list the guy was filling in. The person ahead of us had registered for over 200 things.

    I guess we had spent so long being experts at trying to GET pregnant that we forgot to take the time to figure out what we wanted after it finally happened. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. I am scared of registering too. The only thing that is spurring me on is that I think Babies R Expensive gives you ten percent off anything on your registry that people don’t buy. You did a good job dude.

  3. I can imagine….overwhelming sounds like an understatement.

  4. It’s not that early. I think fewer well thought out items that you really need are better than tons of stuff that is more decorative or stuff that you won’t need for months. And people will buy all kinds of stuff that isn’t on the registry anyhow.

    I’d ask for lots of gift cards, because big stuff doesn’t fit on a plane.

  5. I can imagine as well, I’m sure it’s very scary. But, also amazing and unbelievable ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. THis sounds like me my first time in BRU. I had to go back 3 times before my registry was complete, simply because I got so anxious each time I was there!

  7. it’s hard, that’s for sure ๐Ÿ™‚ it gets easier, i promise.

    i had my first shower when i was 26 weeks and i was VERY uncomfortable!! i forced the registering so that people could have an idea of what we liked and b and i were both so overwhelmed. i felt like i could have, i would have drank a bottle of wine! ๐Ÿ™‚


  8. I’m so sorry that all you’ve been through makes it hard to enjoy your pregnancy. I know your shower will be wonderful and your friends and familly will be so happy they got to celebrate with you!

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