Posted by: birdsandsquirrels | June 17, 2009

nearly telling, but not ready

I’m 12 w 5d. I got the phone message saying that the nuchal translucency results are “normal”. My mom has been dying to tell people in our family for weeks and weeks, and has slipped and told two people. I kind of want to be the one to tell the rest of the family, before she can blab to everyone.  While I feel very protective of the news, I also feel like it is MY news and I want to tell it, when I am ready. If I don’t do it soon, everyone will already know because of family gossip.

I got an inkling of wanting to send out an email today. My family lives 2000 miles away, so email is the best way to do it. I asked S if he felt it was appropriate at this point. He said sure. He has already told several people. I sat down and started to write the email. I selected the recipients and got two sentences in when I started to panic. I deleted the email. I started thinking to myself  “You fool, you are still technically in the first trimester. You can’t announce it yet!”

Friday will be 13 weeks. Maybe I will feel more ready then. I would wait another week, but I don’t think my mom will keep her mouth shut.

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Responses

  1. I completely see your point on the family gossip spreading like a wild fire.

    If it helps, there really isn’t a difference between 12w and 5d and 13w… it’s just a mental thing. And if you don’t want recipients to know that you’re not quite out of the first trimester yet, when you send the email you don’t have to be specific with dates… just say that you’re pregnant and due around Christmas and if someone is really curious they will ask or do the math for themselves.

    I recently did the math for when both of my SILs announced their pregnancies… 6 weeks, both of them. Stupid.

  2. If your mother is anything like my mother, I would certainly get the news out sooner rather than later. 🙂

    Your feelings about wanting to be the one to share your news (and it is YOUR news) are completely justified and EXACTLY how I feel. When I finally get my BFP, my mother will be the 3rd person to know (DH, my daughter first), but I will absolutely be prepared to spread the news to those I feel the need to share it within minutes of that conversation. Otherwise I won’t get to tell anyone!

    Good luck in the remaining months of your pregnancy. May it be textbook through and through. 🙂

  3. You might want to say something soon if you want it to come from you. My MIL took her dog into the vet (DH’s best friend!) and told him our news. He called DH and to say congratulations. DH was like WTF?! And then I hear, “oh, sure, my Mom was in there today with the dog. Thanks.”

    To their benefit they are just excited, but come on people. Back off!

  4. I gave in at 13 weeks. There was no way my father could resist any longer!

  5. I’m glad to read that all is progressing well. GREAT news about the NT test results. About your mom… you’d better beat her to the punch with some of your relatives. Once they’re on a roll with the excitement, it’s hard to stop!

  6. you sound exactly like i did! 🙂 i kept pushing the date back. i still don’t like telling people b/c i’m worried something will happen and i will have to call them up and tell them that, too. arg.

    hang in there….2nd tri is almost here 🙂

  7. You’re almost to the second trimester. I am so happy for you.

    And I can completely understand your fear. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with waiting until you are ready hun (*hugs*)

  8. Congrats on hitting 13 weeks! I’ve never gotten to where you are, but I can imagine how hard of a decision it would be of when to tell. I hope that telling goes just the way you hope!

  9. I am so happy for you — you are crossing your milestones beautifully. I think you should tell people whenever it feels right to you…and if that’s not now, just wait until it comes and feels natural. I just want to say that I just looked back at your earlier posts, when you were where I am now, and it was so incredibly reassuring. I am a complete basket case still, even after “graduating” this week, and I’ve beaten myself up all day for worrying so much (when I’m done worrying about everything else I always come back to worrying that worrying/anxiety is going to be detrimental to the baby). Reading that you went through so many of the same thoughts and feelings is so comforting. Thanks!

  10. Yeah, 13 weeks!! I agree with Good Egg above, just tell as it feels natural. I’m having a hard time telling people (especially work friends), but this weekend I found myself telling a few folks unexpectedly. It’s getting easier each time!

    I’m so happy the NT scan was normal – what a relief.

    BTW, I love being just a few days apart from you, because I totally get everything you are feeling and writing! We can do this.


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