Posted by: birdsandsquirrels | January 8, 2009

12 dpo

Not pregnant. On both a Clearblue Easy Digital and a First Response Early Result.

I know it is possible that it might just be too early, but I’m not going to hold much hope.

I’m not surprised, since there has been so much stress and lack of sleep with the cat emergencies we’ve had over the past 5 days. Yesterday at the recheck appointment, he hadn’t peed in 14 hours, and they couldn’t express any urine from his bladder. The vet was talking about him having reblocked, possible kidney failure, and recatheterization, but they close at 6, so we’d have to take him back to the emergency animal hospital. I totally lost it. We waited four hours for them to do blood work (they were swamped and understaffed) and I was crying in the waiting room in front of everyone and snapping at the receptionist. It seemed like they were helping everyone except us. The receptionists and vet assistants were fawning over kittens that needed nail trims while my fucking cat could be dying.  S came there after work and we were prepared to take him back to the hospital. When they finally got the blood work done  (at 8:00pm), his kidneys and everything looked normal, and the vet’s new theory was that the antibiotic was making his stomach upset, he wasn’t eating, and because of that, his body was holding on to the fluids and not peeing. They gave him fluids, pain medicine, anti-nausea medicine, charged us $500, and sent us home to watch him like a hawk. If he didn’t pee or seemed worse, we were to take him straight to the emergency hospital.

When we got him home, he peed right away. Then he pooed a few hours later. It had been 5 days of no bowel movements, so that was a big deal. He ate food. He seemed in less pain. In general, he was doing a lot better. We still aren’t out of the woods – if he stops peeing again, or stops eating and drinking, we are in trouble. He needs a urinalysis still and possible medication to acidify the urine. He has food allergies, so we can’t just change him to a urinary diet food. Oh, and he also has a raging ear infection, probably because someone at the emergency hospital offered him something he was allergic to.

This is all completely boring to read about and unrelated to infertility except that it has been so stressful. I wouldn’t be surprised if the stress and lack of sleep interfered with implantation and ruined this cycle. I guess we will never know. I am just glad that my cat seems to be stable for now. But now we can’t really afford to do more injectables until we save up money, so I’m really disappointed and depressed about that. But isn’t that what infertility is all about – spending tons of money for shitty odds, being disappointed time and time again, and depression? That’s been my experience anyway.



  1. Yeah for pee and poop! I hope he keeps it up. I really hope things start going more smoothly for you and your kitty.

    Sorry to hear about the cycle. You probably don’t want to hear “It’s still early” given what happened last cycle, but I’m still hoping there’s a chance.

    Are you expecting a tax return? It will take a while to get it, but that should put some money in the fertility piggy bank. Good luck.

  2. It is not boring to hear about your cats. I am pretty sure most of us can relate to you. I remember when Mr. was at the vet with my baby he told her “whatever it costs, my wife will KILL me if anything happens to this cat.” And he was right.

    I am sorry about your BFN. Do you sometimes feel like if you stare at it really hard it will change? Then it doesn’t and I want to throw it.

    Try and rest.

  3. I’m really sorry you’ve been under such stress. I hope your kitty feels better soon. Not to be all Pollyanna-ish, but it could still be too early for a BFP. The one time I was actually pregnant it never registered on a HPT, and the beta was positive (don’t remember the exact number maybe around 30?). Do what you need to get through the rest of the wait.

  4. I’m really sorry about your kitty. I know how stressful it can be, and the expense adds to the stress.

    I hope the poop and pee indicates that he is on the mend.

  5. Wow, yes, I can relate to the kitty problems. Stay well, kitty!!

    I’m really sorry about the bfp, and the financial nightmare that is IF. Sending lots of hugs your way.

  6. I’m just so sorry about that ordeal with your cat. I completely understand everything you’re saying and feeling. My husband had surgery this week and it actually occurred to me that it may be a warped blessing that I’m no longer pg b/c the stress of everything probably would have been really bad for a developing fetus. And as a fellow cat parent I totally get that taking care of a sick one would have the same effect! Sorry about the bfn but I’m hopeful that soon you will look back on this time and it will feel very far away.

  7. 😦 darnit! i still have some hope, but lately i have been all about hope!

    i am glad that your kitty seems to be doing better, and i really hope he’s on the upswing!

  8. Sorry for the BFN… it’s not over yet though.

    And doubly sorry for the kitty troubles. I really do sympathize, I have 5 of them and I freak out when anything happens to them. I am really hoping yours gets better.

  9. aww, i hope your kitty is feeling better!
    sorry about the bfn and the jerkfaces at the animal hospital.

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